Two weeks ago was a one of those life-changing weeks. One of my dear friend’s baby girl who, at 46 days old, passed away. As it is with all new born babies; it was such an honour to meet this little girl.

I visited Aves a couple of times in the neonatal intensive care unit and each time I watched this young human being growing, moving, looking and learning. She was clearly thinking and being intrigued about the world in which she existed with respirators, monitors and several IV lines wrapped around her tiny arms and legs and the chatter of her mum and dad with nurses and doctors.

As I stood by her little bed and watched her mum and dad do all that they could do to help her to be comfortable and to remind her to be brave or to relax or that she was loved, I couldn’t help think what a wonderful gift new life is and how important deep connections are right from the get-go.

46 days into Aves’ life, with all the many complications,  her parents and doctors made the decision to take her off the ventilator and laid her to rest in her mum and dads arms; life so fragile and so precious wrapped in love. For the first time, in a long time, I had the jolting realisation just how important life is and that there is never a point where we should forget this – nothing new, but so often forgotten and sometimes lost.

In the busyness of our lives we get caught up in so many ‘life’ matters. We get distracted and stressed, we get angry, we get disappointed, and these thoughts consume our thinking, dictate our relationships and drive our responses. This has to change. We need to, as Aves’ mum puts it, love more and do it explicitly.

Friday 3rd October came round and it was time to celebrate Aves’ life. As I stood before the little girl, tears streaming, I realised how often I miss the opportunity to cherish those people who I love. It took this precious little one to remind me!

So the purpose of this blog is to remind each of us to stop what we are doing and think about how we are cherishing those people that we love and love us. It is a reminder to go and to look them square in the eyes and tell them how important they are. Forget the awkwardness or the discomfort you might feel! None of us are mind readers, all of us need to hear and feel and see the love. The age of guessing must be over. We must be consistently explicit lovers.

Aves’ mum has shared her blog. It is the journey they took together as a mother and daughter. You might like to read it here.

For now though, my recommendation is that you try to form a ‘love more’ habit. This will mean those people around you will daily know just how important they are to you. The habit should verbalise your love, put it into action and it should leave none of it hidden.


Love more.


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